Posted by alexandra_k on November 30, 2005, at 3:25:56
In reply to Re:, posted by alexandra_k on November 30, 2005, at 3:13:07
and death will come...
soon enough.and maybe it is just that there will be days like this...
but to be fair it is only sometimes days
very rarely weeks
and months... only once
most often it is hours
or minutes
and snap something changes
and i'm either all right or not all right
or in some flattened state...
thats not really all right but could go eiher wayand i am just raving of course...
but i do think that sometimes in trying to conquer emotions with reason it just makes the emotion worse
and repression...
is a form of denial of reality
which i manage quite well
and forgetting
convenient forgetting
i think that is what it is called
i suppose i manage that quite well tooand i don't know what i'm saying...
on a bit of a different note...
sometimes i think nobody is reading...
nobody is really reading...
but i wanted to say
(i appreciate that people mean well)
but i wanted to say
that something that i find really hard to take...
is people saying that i'm smart
its something that i'm really sensitive about
something that i react to
because i've been told i'm f*cking stupid most my life
and even wittgenstein was stupid
berated himself for his stupidity
which is what people should do sometimes methinks
because human beings are very dumb animals indeed
and people saying that...
i hate it
and i wish people would stop
and i don't know what to say
i don't know what to say to get them to stop it
to not say that
so i just ignore it and hope it goes away
but if anyone is still reading...
if you know...
please can you tell me how to make it stop?
poster:alexandra_k
thread:575153
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20051022/msgs/583613.html