Posted by alexandra_k on December 1, 2005, at 4:21:34
In reply to Re: » alexandra_k, posted by zeugma on November 30, 2005, at 17:21:21
> i have had NO good ex[eriences with therapy, with therapists.
:-(
I think... Good therapists can be very hard to find indeed... And fit is important... A good fit. And sometimes... That can be very hard indeed.>i have heard them tell me that what i was doing was wrong, that i was conceptualizing it incorrectly, etc. That was simply not true.
Yeah. I find it hard when people utter falsehoods dogmatically too.
I think the trouble comes
(sometimes sometimes)
Becuase they don't think very hard.
Or because...
That way of seeing it worked for them...
But then it only worked for them because they are more 'reliliant' (ie they don't struggle so much in the first place).
Like how... The more you learn...
The more you realise how truely ignorant you are...
Like that.
Some people haven't learned enough to appreciate their own ignorance...
But then...
Some people can't handle the thought that their therapist is a person...
A fallible and limited and ignorant person...
Just like everybody else in the world.
I don't know...
I'm not really sure what I'm saying...>People who have a professional stake in having insight often lose their abilities to perceive.
When 'insight' is required...
Sometimes false insight is something that people cling to...
Because they can't afford to drown...
And maybe they are more afraid of it than we are.> why should they be? people inevitably are concerned with their own survival, and i suppose these hobbies help people who enjoy them survive, by making life more meaningful.
Yeah.
It is just that those kinds of hobbies...
Well...
I don't find them to be particularly meaningful...
So...
There it is.>others are more direct about it, and put a great stake in figuring things out for themselves. being a professional or even amateur thinker has its hazards as well. much as those whose profession is in providing insight lose the capacity to differentiate their own assesments of the situation from the situation itself. getting lost in thought has its dangers.
Yeah.
But I guess...
I'd prefer to be this way than the other...
Even given the pain???
Yes.
Even given that...> ok, that is my life too. trying to fix what's broken. to use the metaphor that quine was fond of, i have been trying to fix the ship while out at sea. and that is not easy.
yes.
> and the moments when it seems easy are the most dangerous ones, because then the guard is down, vigilance is at its least, and the storm starts up again,
yes... but... it wears one down... gradually... eventually... to live in a state of high tension and not have someplace... where one can be at ease and trust that things are okay and that other people are okay...
when the storm starts up again... then its time to worry...
but don't forget to enjoy the calm...i don't think it is about happiness...
i think...
it might be about contentment...
and clearskies is right...
about how one needs to accept and trust and care for oneself before...
one will be able to take that reliably from the world.
it can be hard to trust oneself when one feels like one is untrustworthy...
but intentions...
desire not to hurt others...
desire not to be a hippocrite...
are good intentions
:-)
can you take some contentment from that?
that you are such that...
you value those things...
and try and nurture those...> well it's less a search for answers than a search for ways to stay afloat. but stopping is not a good thing.
> dear alexandra
> i am waterlogged
(((z)))contentment...
i hope we can find it one day...
poster:alexandra_k
thread:575153
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20051022/msgs/584074.html