Posted by Jen Star on July 17, 2005, at 22:54:04 [reposted on July 22, 2005, at 0:51:25 | original URL]
In reply to Re: Thanks so much everyone.. » pinkeye, posted by pinkeye on July 17, 2005, at 18:52:16
Pinkeye,
I think that it's a looooong road to emotional strength and independence for a woman who is used to being dominated and is afraid of being alone.But I think you're taking the first step by telling us here. I hope you're strong enough to keep taking steps, even if it's slow, until you get to a place where you are free and happy and confident.
I see from reading your notes that you've given up because it's hard. You say that it's "karma" that you're treated badly. It's not karma, it's YOUR CHOICE. It's as simple as that, and as hard as that.
If you want to keep getting hit, you'll stay. If you want to stop getting hit, you'll leave. I know you said that you rely on him for strength, that's he's good a lot of the time, etc. But that's all just rationalization. The unknown is scary, and it's hard to be alone. But you're making a choice. Life doesn't just happen, you choose it. And if you elect not to do anything, that's a choice too.
Pinkeye,
I like you and I worry about you. If you go back to India, I believe the domination and hitting will get worse, because (correct me if I'm wrong) I believe that the patriarchal society in India tacitly approves of men hitting their wives, or at least doesn't discourage it as actively as in the USA. I hope that I'm wrong, but from what I've read, domestic abuse can be a big issue in India.It sounds like you have a difficult choice. I hope you have the strength to do what's right for YOU.
Take care of yourself, Pinkeye!
(((pinkeye)))
JenStar
poster:Jen Star
thread:531323
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050627/msgs/531344.html