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Seduction and Punishment in the Therapeutic

Posted by Susan47 on May 8, 2005, at 0:06:28

In reply to Re: He wasn't just a Man, He was my Therapist!, posted by Susan47 on May 7, 2005, at 14:34:12

Relationship...
now this is an interesting concept. One that I have to say was completely accurate in the way my ex-T treated me. I remember asking him, when I called once, at the beginning of therapy, I called him and I was upset, and I asked him if he thought I was acting crazy, or crazy. Pause. He replies, "Not to ME you're not".
Right away, I'm thinking immediately, that was manipulative. That was a deliberate manipulation and he thinks I can't see it. Now that was really funny. If he'd even said those words without the emphasis on the ME, it would've been an awkward thing to have said. Because he's setting up my reliance on him. Right there. That was the beginning of me noticing. Well, maybe not. Maybe the beginning was the look of extreme interest on his face when he first saw me, then the eventual ignoring of me when my ex- was there, in therapy with me, together, at the beginning. I mean, no man has to look at a woman like that unless there's some intent to nonverbally express something. Which is like lying.
There were a lot of things. A lot of things. Here, something from this book, "'There are only two ways to do real damage to patients: seducing them and punishing them. If you do neither of those things, then you can't get into serious trouble.' (Seducing meant more than literally seducing them; it meant working to arouse their desire for you, their admiration for you, their dependence on you. Punishing meant anything, however subtle, calculated to hurt them.)"
This book reverberated with me, with my personal experience with this therapist.
Now I'm wondering, how many other women's he done this to? Who's he STILL doing it to?
It's absolutely no wonder I was having nightmares.


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poster:Susan47 thread:492110
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050505/msgs/495075.html