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Re: He wasn't just a Man, He was my Therapist!

Posted by Susan47 on May 7, 2005, at 14:34:12

In reply to He wasn't just a Man, He was my Therapist!, posted by Susan47 on May 7, 2005, at 10:41:13

I finally picked up this book "In Session" and it's frightening how ignorant my T was, until too far along in the relationship, of what he was doing.. it says here, "Some have used suggestive, even coercive, techniques to gain complaince, modify behavior, or convert a client to their way of thinking. They have directed therapy toward goals that were not disclosed, let alone negotiated, with the client, seemingly under the assumption that the therapist knows best."
Several months after he terminated me by telephone, I asked him, "What were you trying to do, in therapy with me?"
His answer?
"I was trying to build your trust"
By staring at my chest, dear Doctor?
By dressing to the nines because I had, one day, come in and confessed my love to you? Did you think that would show me that I was important to you, too? Did you think you were dealing with a child? Because I'm quite capable of using language; aren't you? After I let you know, with my head-to-toe assessment of you, that I was definitely not impressed, you came in deliberately casually sloppy.
And finally, returned to "normal".
This T I was going to was so incredibly manipulative. I had to be that, too, in the end, and I Hated not being able to be honest with him. He was the best obfuscator ever .. I quote, "A client's negative feelings can be very threatening to a therapist."
That man terminated me because of my negative feelings.
He terminated me for all of my feelings.
He didn't know how to be honest with me, the idiot said this, "My machine only takes seven messages".
It was insulting to be lied to.
"I don't have any availability this week, I have nothing next week either"
I really don't think I liked the way he behaved.

This relationship with a therapist is so important to me and I'm not the only one, I am so Normal it's beautiful, I love that, I wish I'd read this book a long time ago.
Thank you to this Board, thank you to every single one of you who brought that book, and so many others, to my attention.


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poster:Susan47 thread:492110
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050505/msgs/494895.html