Posted by sunnydays on August 8, 2007, at 9:12:45
In reply to When to stay, and when to move on » sunnydays, posted by Nathan_Arizona on August 8, 2007, at 7:59:15
I agree that T's should not bring their issues into the room. I do think that sometimes that can be difficult, however. I am reminded of when my T was seriously injured and called me when he was feeling sick from the pain meds. I felt so horrible that he would think he needed to call me when he felt like that (he had to hang up after about a minute because he felt like he was going to throw up). But at the same time, it really showed that he cared about me and understood that I would be really scared he was dead or something.
My T discloses quite a bit to me, but that is because I wouldn't trust him if I didn't know quite a bit about him. I think there probably have been times where his personal issues have affected him. And there have certainly been times I was ready to quit because he said something that I interpreted as meaning that I was too difficult or that he hated me. When he explained it later, it became clear that he really hadn't meant it like that, even though that's how it sounded. One time he made a sarcastic comment at a really bad moment, but he basically spent the session apologizing (I thought he was going to cry). He was explaining that sometimes when he does that I smile and that he was just trying to make me feel a little better by bringing in some humor, but obviously it backfired totally. He did so well that session with the apologizing, that I felt more trusting of him than I ever had before after that. That's why I'm such an advocate of giving a T at least one chance to make things better. I was ready to not go back after that comment, but by giving him that chance it totally changed my therapy for the better.
sunnydays
poster:sunnydays
thread:774336
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070807/msgs/774762.html