Posted by ElaineM on September 10, 2006, at 19:50:03
In reply to Re: Lurp » ElaineM, posted by llrrrpp on September 10, 2006, at 14:31:42
lurp: I always mean to say how much your posts sound like guided imagery that EDstaff used to do. You are good at calling up that calming "voice". I do sometimes work on accepting that the physical pain is just always gonna be there, and not going to disappear through meds, or wishing, or other treatments. And I work on feeling it differently, rather than trying to not feel it at all. (i don't know if that makes sense, but...) I'm ok when going through a pretty good period, but nothing helps flare ups. I have an MRI again next week. T's coming. Pretty scared. I never realized how hard it is to stay perfectly still for half an hour, until I started doing these. And I've never ever been claustrophobic but that tube is crazy-making. I try to do the "focusing" stuff then.
****
Just talked to T and he said something upsetting. i'm so confused. I've been good ignoring the world this weekend, but it's getting late enough in the day to start being scared of Monday. i don't know what to do about this.... And this will be the first week that i haven't been a student ever (except for the years that i was in the hospital instead)......what am i going to do about this. he is good. he is so good. I don't need to worry. And i don't need to hurt myself again. i am ok. i am lucky to see him... But still....i get my prescription tomorrow so maybe this kind will kill my nerves. Why is this such a big deal....I emailed CC even though it's against policy, to make sure she still has my address. Just in case. or just to feel like I'm talking to her. Not because i'm scared. i don't know why......nervous nervous nervous....it is easiest to remember I'm alone on weekdays. why am i talking to myself :(
poster:ElaineM
thread:684345
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060826/msgs/684815.html