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Re: delayed breakdowns-back again » ghost

Posted by B2chica on June 18, 2004, at 11:40:22

In reply to Re: delayed breakdowns-back again » B2chica, posted by ghost on June 18, 2004, at 11:07:58

> i'm so PROUD of you for giving that letter to your T! that's awesome. good job!! that took a lot of guts and effort on your part. i'm so proud.

Ghost
i gotta say i felt Real good about this one. In fact last appt i told him i did a similar thing, my boss really upset me but later instead of keeping it bottled up i wrote him an email sent it and left Real quick (i said i was such a chicken sh*t but whatever worked right?) well this was sort of the same thing. as long as i didn't have to confront him f2f i had a little more strength to just leave it and RUN!
:)

> as far as looking at everyday objects and relating them to SI tools... sometimes it was just a relief to know i had a way out nearby.

i think you're right that maybe i do need to be careful here. i don't think i saw them as a way to die, but i do feel "safer" in a wierd way knowing i can SI anytime if i need to. i think what you said is a good warning cue to me though. that maybe i should be careful, more 'on the lookout' for crossing over.

> does your T have your work number?
i'm not sure...i think so?
But i am Really focused on next tuesday. i am starting to really see him as someone to talk to, someone who will help me. So i think if that time came that i would really call him for help.

>>if you need net access over the weekend to talk to us, make sure you try the local library.

i actually have an outside key to my work so i could get in here for access if needed, but my husband's made all sorts of plans for me this weekend (i really hope several get "rained out") cuz being around crowds sometimes sets me off. not in front of them but later when i'm alone i have a breakdown. and of course both days he want's to be around my parents...i LOVE's my daddy and do want to see him a little on father's day but can't handle both of them for TWO whole days!
-yes i've explained this to my hubby, he just got grumpy and said 'whatever', so we'll see if he listens or not.

i just can't thank you enough for caring. i'm starting to feel a little funny again. (i wish i could explain this feeling that crosses the physical/mental boarder. But that's my one warning to stay away from known triggers= certain music, certain people, not walking around with a small pocket knife in my pocket...

-maybe i will try to pop on for a little bit tomorrow, if i can.

btw-when are you leaving to NH? how much longer are you in big red country?

b2c.


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poster:B2chica thread:357559
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040614/msgs/357805.html