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Re: Avoiding sex with my wife. » Declan

Posted by Larry Hoover on May 13, 2006, at 8:18:37

In reply to Re: Avoiding sex with my wife. » Estella, posted by Declan on May 13, 2006, at 0:18:10

> Naturally I have already talked to her. When I mentioned this thread and my post she said, 'well, do they (men) really want it that much either?' Meaning, 'if you did, that MIGHT turn me on a bit'.
> The way this is conventionally put is that romantic love fades and is replaced by something else...something more mature.
> I think it would be easier all round (especially at this end of things) if sexual faithfulness was not so important to us.

Being taken for granted is hardly an inspiration to sexual expression, I should think. And I think the taking and being taken are reciprocal. You have to show that there is something else at play. When's the last time you spontaneously told her how much she means to you? When's the last time you snuck her away on a date? Ya know?

I know how crushing it can be to be rebuffed in those circumstances, though. I'm not making any assumptions. Just trying to ask the right question. Some women are happy to let the fire go out. There is no stock answer.

Lar

 

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poster:Larry Hoover thread:641864
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060511/msgs/643388.html