Posted by alexandra_k on January 31, 2006, at 21:49:47
In reply to Re: I am in a funny mood..., posted by alexandra_k on January 31, 2006, at 21:27:45
who am i kidding, it is the meth, or lack thereof...
drugs are more a part of my life than i care to admit...
and they help. they do. the number of times i have got into one of those really bad places... when i am about prepared to do something really very crazy and possibly irrevokable... and i have a smoke or something and then i come right. i come right. i do. they help. they do.
and i manage to get through the come down okay.
feel a bit blah but okay because i know it is only to be expected and it will pass in a couple days. i know that one of my states will pass in a couple days too but that is different 'cause of the panic.
hmm.
sometimes i really see that...
i am a whole heap more dysfunctional than people realise.sometimes i feel really very angry that...
i don't have a therapist.still...
best not go there...
again...
the story is getting old now.i don't think i belong anywhere
and i don't think i'll ever be able to bring reason and emotion in to line
caught
and there is no escape
just have to soldier on
and not reflect on the deficiencies too much...
'tis a crock anyways
mostly
i really do believe
or maybe i'm just reacting
defensively
i can't so i don't want it anyway
but who am i kidding?
certainly not me
it doesn't matter
it doesn't matter
there is nothing to be done
poster:alexandra_k
thread:602943
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20051204/msgs/605026.html