Posted by rskontos on December 9, 2008, at 11:26:48
In reply to Re: Dissociation and me As I see it (triggers-maybe) » rskontos, posted by muffled on December 8, 2008, at 23:44:02
Thanks Muffled. Yes he did. It was so funny that I went in and said I have nothing to say. And at the end, he said I am glad you had nothing to say. We joked.
The disclosure discussion was a good one too. He is so good at explaining to me why I feel like I do about one moment telling my guts to all and the next minute hiding in a corner.
He is silent enough and asks enough questions.
I have gotten so much better at telling him when I disagree with him and when I think he is wrong. And the best part is I carry that over at home. Before, I just retreated in all situations. Until I got angry. And over-reacted of course. So now I can tell my H or son when to back off before I escalate to a point of when my inner teen gets sets of, or worse when the really angry one comes to the forefront.
He has helped me and I am slowly seeing that. So I guess I am beginning to trust him more.
I don't see telling him stuff necessarily as trust because I have always had a certain level of stuff I would tell anyone. He is still on that level. But recently I have disclosed some stuff to him I haven't told anyone else. Then I wait to see to what he does with it. Not a test but to see if I can trust him.
And a year isn't all that long with a therapist. So all in all, he has been good for me.
And yes you are so right the day of and after are really hard. I have to try certain things to stay present in the world. The weird thing is I am getting more floaty at home. Never happened before. And my flashbacks are coming back slowly. I am trying hard to be ready for them.
I guess whatever I learn won't hurt like it did the first time. I have an inkling of what is coming and I do dread it but I need to finally release it .
Yes kids are more in tuned with us than we realize. My son is more sensitive than his sister. He gets worried about me.I agree about good things about dissociating. I just do it at odd times and it isn't convenient. So if I had more control then maybe.
Yeah my t is big on healing. He has healed many.
thanks muffled.I will post more so I can hopefully hold on to my good feelings between sessions.
thanks so much....back at you (((((((Muffled))))))))))
rsk
rsk
poster:rskontos
thread:867558
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081205/msgs/867710.html