Posted by Deneb on February 6, 2007, at 0:55:57
I don't know how to act so people won't think I'm manipulative. I always write the wrong things.
I hate it so much. I'm just really upset right now. I don't want to feel this way. I can't handle it.
I want to change. I want to be a better person, but it's hard. I'm too focused on myself. I'm not sensitive to other people's feelings.
(after a while)
I feel a little better now. At least I'm not crying anymore. Now I just feel sad. That makes me want to cry some more. :-(
I know one thing for sure. There is something majorly wrong with me, my personality, the way I relate with others. I have to try to fix it, but it's really really hard. Please forgive me and my faults. I know it isn't good enough, but I'm doing the best I can.
I question everything now. Will people think I'm being manipulative by writing this post? I just don't "get it". I don't understand. I don't want to be manipulative. I don't know how not to be.
If I write I hate myself, that can be seen as being manipulative too. I just learned that. I don't know what to write anymore. Everything I do is manipulative. I'm upset. By writing that I'm upset I'm being manipulative. I don't know what to do.
I don't know how to be a better person.
Deneb*
poster:Deneb
thread:730248
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070203/msgs/730248.html