Posted by ElaineM on December 7, 2006, at 10:55:13
In reply to Re: Telling something hard/bad without hurting mor » ElaineM, posted by LlurpsieBlossom on December 7, 2006, at 9:11:14
Thanks LL:
>>>>how do YOU feel when one of us reveals something bad that happened to them, or something bad that they did?
When people say things here, I have kind emotions, but no judgement. But I worry that that's only because I think I'm lower than others. You know. If I had some esteem (like normal people have) would I judge then? Do "normal" people who like themselves, look down at others who do, or say things that they'd never want connected to *their* person/life?
I guess sometimes people do say some specifics. But mostly we just say a sentence, to encapsulate what has happened, or what our diagnosis is, or whatnot. Or even just hint at, and suggest in a subtle way. I'm scared of the raw details. Which I don't think I've seen much posted here. ANd that's probably cause it's too private, I guess. Not always the right place. (I wouldn't ever say it here. I'm not asking for that) But I'd need to IRL. Need to soon. And I don't know how to do that. I don't even want details in my own head, nevermind coming out of my mouth infront of someone who I'm a person to, and not only a patient/client. :-(
>>>>You are going through a lot right now, and if you're isolated and not getting out much, it's too easy to let your thoughts run away on you.
Not at home all the time. But yes, I am going through alot.
>>>>I know you need help- is there a way to make that happen?
I did - partly. I'm really proud that i took care of myself that way. But I mean *personal* help in the long-run. Someone to be with me after. Different from a therapist - even a good one. [His love is not helpful this way.] Saw him Monday cause I didn't know what else to do. Still can't think. But then I cancelled the rest of the week. I don't want to do anything. I don't have the energy to deal with him too.
>>>>> Is this what telling the hard thing is all about?
No. not that. And not about T at all. I'm sorry - this is hard too. I'm relieved you don't think hearing bad stuff is gross or condemnable. Is that just cause you can't see me? does that kinda make me not a real person, so then it's hard to generate a feeling as strong as disgust or hate, for a "ghost"?
I trust you. I trust a good number of people here. I have no trust in the rest of the world :( I just need to figure out what to do now. And how to tolerate.
Thanks for responding. I've never tried a chai latte - that'd be nice.
blove, EL
poster:ElaineM
thread:711037
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061123/msgs/711141.html