Posted by cricket on April 7, 2006, at 7:49:21
In reply to Re: Boundaries with Mothers » cricket, posted by special_k on April 6, 2006, at 20:58:19
> do you still see her?
Just a couple times of year, and it's always at her house or some public place. She's never been in my apartment.
I do talk to her though a couple of times a month. Mostly because of my son - he has a bit of a relationship with her, which I don't want to deprive him of because he really doesn't have any other family.
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> i need to say to him: if you don't want her to phone then you need to tell her that.
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> i want to say to him: for f*cks sake stand up for yourself for once in your life and quit your whining to me.
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Yeah it's hard. Sometimes you just don't want to rock the boat and it's easier just to let them blab away and ignore it as best you can.>
> now.. it is a little easier (when i am in a good space and can handler her aka sympathise with her feelings endlessly)
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It's great you can do that much. I think my mother wants that too. Wants me to say "oh i know how difficult it is and how you suffer, blah, blah, blah"I have such a huge feeling of revulsion whenever I hear her voice though. I want to vomit, I feel like I need a shower, like bugs are crawling on me or something.
Last time she called she said, "Don't you think it's about time you did something with your life?"
I said, "I was thinking of taking up heroin. And then there's homicide of course. The murder rate has dipped far too low in New York. I really think I could turn that around."
She was not amused.
And the sad part is that I wasn't really joking. The temptation to do something self-destructive just to spite her is so great sometimes.
poster:cricket
thread:629668
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060220/msgs/630005.html