Posted by octopusprime on July 25, 2005, at 21:08:38
In reply to husbands and sex **possible trigger**, posted by B2chica on July 18, 2005, at 9:25:33
b2c:
the only suggestion i have is to talk to your hubby.
remember, you are a team. if he helps to make you happy, it will make him happy. he knows that sex is 100x better with a willing and happy partner.
sex will make him happy, and meet his needs. so it would be nice if you could find a way to help him meet your needs without making yourself feel hurt, disgusted, or miserable. you feeling hurt, disgusted, or miserable is in *nobody's* best interest.
so when you enjoyed sex, what was it that helped?
i know i talked to my hubby about foreplay and oral sex: that it really helped to get me going. (sunny10 had excellent advice about lubricant! but it helps if your hubby helps to get nature's lubricant going)
and maybe if he's talking to you, before and during the act, about how beautiful and wonderful b2c is and how privileged he is to be sharing this moment in time with you, etc. making you feel valued and special in an "act of love", not just a piece of meat.
i think your hubby will understand: if he helps you get past this block then you will be more responsive and it will be better for him in the long run. good luck
poster:octopusprime
thread:531367
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050724/msgs/533483.html