Posted by Susan47 on May 4, 2005, at 10:54:50
In reply to Re: I know you're all sick of this issue right now, posted by sunny10 on May 4, 2005, at 8:04:34
What you did with the letter-writing, that was what I did too in one relationship that was, I hate to say it because it was no bearing on the outcome of yours, obviously, but the relationship was abusive and ill-balanced and ending. And he'd read the letters with great interest, every time, and things would change a titch for a little while but only enough so that he was always getting just what he wanted, no less. But in the end, I gave him more, a lot more. And I think he learned something about manipulation, and that's the first time I've ever said that and seen it for what it truly was. I used to feel so guilty and so bad about myself for "loving" him so much, and I see now that, finally, I see it, you know, that he was manipulating my love from the very beginning, that's the type of person he just is. I met him again about fifteen years later, and the *sshole had the temerity to suggest that we should "make love" .. now mind you, for some reason we'd met at the bar, dancing or something I don't even remember, and we decided we both didn't want to sleep alone, so I did bring him home and we did sleep together, but no sex. But the next morning he tried, calling it "making love" and I'm afraid, well actually I'm happy quite happy to say that I verbally slapped him with that one. I said with the things that happened in our relationship and the way you dumped me, how can you ever call what we did and what you want to do, "making love"? I feel sorry for you" I said, and it felt good, because I knew then and I know now that I was right. I think he's still single. He'll be almost fifty now. Fireman, you know?
poster:Susan47
thread:492670
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050325/msgs/493618.html