Posted by jujube on September 21, 2004, at 10:21:43
In reply to Re: Why I think this is hard right now » jujube, posted by partlycloudy on September 21, 2004, at 10:04:36
AA isn't for everyone. I wasn't exactly an active AA member (read the 12 steps, the Big Book, Living Sober, etc.), but going to the meetings, and hearing the stories of others' roads to recovery helped me immensely in the early months of my recovery. I actually never even had a sponsor (although a friend of mine who had over 25 years of sobriety at the time and had worked as a director of an addictions recovery home, and his wife (also a recovered addict/alcholic) kind of acted as surrogate sponsors and gave me the strength, support and encouragement I needed along the way. You need to find what works for you (and you will). And, when you think about having a drink, just think about what your life was really like before you stopped and how drinking made you feel - both physically and emotionally. That's what I do and, no pun intended, it always ends up being a very sobering reflection. I don't want to feel shaky, paranoid, and worried to the extent that I was in my last few years of drinking. Don't get me wrong. I still worry and sometimes feel inadequate, anxious and down. But who doesn't. I think sometimes our alcholic brains convince us that everybody else is happy and we're not. What I have realized is that alcholic or not, sober or using, we still have to face adversity. But, for me at least, being sober helps me deal with problems in a more rational way. I don't know if what I have said helps, but have faith that things will get better. Be patient and be good to yourself. Patience is particuarly important. We alcholics are always in such a rush to feel good fast. We want results. The results will come when you stop beating yourself up and learn to love and accept yourself for who you are, warts and all. On my 5 year chip, I had a phrase that sums it up for me, and often helps me get through the tough times - The ox is slow but the earth is patient. I guess for me, this just reminds me that I can't do everything and things will fall into place when the time is right. Hang in there, and I am here if you need to talk.
> Thank you - your post is encouraging for me. I'm hoping with the therapy I'm participating in that I won't be a dry drunk eventually. I had not one, not two, but three bad experiences with AA, so I determined that I have to find another path to sobriety. (Of course, I felt like a failure that it wasn't working for me, but that's another symptom, isn't it?)
>
> best regards,
> pc
poster:jujube
thread:391514
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20040722/msgs/393330.html