Posted by Psychopoppy on January 29, 2004, at 23:31:29
In reply to I would not do that, posted by PhoenixGirl on January 28, 2004, at 16:35:09
Hi
I guess I did not explain myself well enough. I certainly was not suggesting you putting yourself down. Maybe it was my interpretation but the sense I got from your original post was that perhaps these jealous women you mention were somehow not connecting with you or were finding you unapproachable. And another feeling I got from you post was that you'd like to be able to get past this cold distant vibe and perhaps get to a warmer and more comfortable place in your job-social environment. And, thats why I suggested sort-of ice-breaker stratgies. I dont mean to assume that you have in any way brought this upon yourslef and need to do things to fix it. Although I have seen some women who seem to have distanced themselves from the general populace of a work place (for whatever reason), and then later it was revealed that they felt unconnected to others and felt as if other were jealous of them (again for many reasons) and hence thought it best to keep a cold arm's length from everyone. Of course, the jealousy is real and (quite stupid really in my opinion) and some women seem to have a pretty high bitch-factor than others...but its not always a lost cause, as in some women could overcome that given time and more knowledge.
So, basically in my post, I meant to suggest an approach to connect to people (if that is something you want from your work place). Of course putting oneself down is not what I would do either, but then bragging and conceit is the other extreme. What I suggested was something is between. Just a way to connect to someone with a somewhat low self-esteem by just showing to them that you're not perfect. I dont mean to offend you but as we all know very well, noone is perfect.... so acknowledging that is not putting yourself down......but rather a sign of self-assuredness.down with jealousy, and vive la tolerance !
poster:Psychopoppy
thread:306196
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040120/msgs/307125.html