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Re: Sex and other stuff I know nothin about (boring) » Tamar

Posted by alexandra_k on July 31, 2005, at 19:09:46

In reply to Re: Sex and other stuff I know nothin about (boring) » kid47, posted by Tamar on July 31, 2005, at 18:38:48

> I'm not so sure that men and women are very different. People say that women need to understand how men NEED sex. But I think women need sex too; we're just not allowed (by social convention) to admit it openly. Similarly, men need love; love is not just for women!
>
> I think there are different kinds of things. Sex can be a sport. And sex can be part of love. I do think sex can be more intimate and more fulfilling when it's part of love, although it can be very physically fulfilling when it's a sport. But there's an emotional satisfaction that both men and women experience when sex is an expression of love.
>
> But of course, even when sex is part of love, it can be approached in a way that's not terribly serious. And even when it's just a casual encounter it can feel profoundly spiritual.
>
> As you say, it's a complex mixture of passion, deep emotions, physical pleasure and baggage. That's what makes it so worthwhile!

Amen!

But do you ever wonder...
About how for guys the aim is for the guy to have the big o.
It is perceived as a big problem if a guy is having trouble with that.
If a girl is having trouble with that thats just like 'oh well, you and however many % of other women out there...'

And the guys aim is taken to be the crucial one. The important one. The 'proper function'. It takes precedence over the girls...

And maybe the different needs
(that can conflict)
Create an inbalance right there...

I also think about...
How many women talk about feeling dirty. used. Yeah, I've heard guys talk about that a bit on this board (interesting...) but in general that seems to be a girl thing. why is that? innate tendancies, or social???


I think... That our bodies are different. Innate difference. As I heard somewhere... Girls are more like slow cookers and guys are more like gas. And so what that means... Is that in order for BOTH to have a good time the guy actually has to hold off on his urges a little. But many don't... Because the whole point is for the guy to have an o.

And so because of these differences...
Its too easy for a girl to end up feeling like her needs preferences etc have just been fairly much disregarded in order for the guy to do what the guy needs to do...

And isn't that the point?

 

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poster:alexandra_k thread:534819
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050724/msgs/536127.html