Posted by Dinah on December 31, 2008, at 11:19:30
In reply to Grief, posted by DAisym on December 23, 2008, at 2:46:36
I hope you were able to accept his offer, if he did indeed make one. I used to feel really guilty about what I considered to be taking his free time. He told me once that I wasn't really very good at accepting grace. :) I think I've come to accept that whether he is offering because he is worried about me, or if he is offering because he really would like to offer, that he wouldn't be offering if he felt like he'd mind it. I guess tone of voice is important, though. Did he sound as if he was offering out of duty or that he was not happy about offering? Or did he sound as if this was something he wanted to do? If he sounded as if he wanted to do it, maybe it is a good time to practice accepting grace with grace.
I've been thinking about your son. I think I can understand how you feel and would likely feel the same myself. My son and I have open discussions about different religions, and I've always been clear that I don't really care where he ends up in his faith journey, but I also admit that I would vastly prefer that he have some relationship with God, no matter what religion he chose. I disappointed my father a lot by not choosing to be Catholic, but I always went to midnight mass with him until he was too unwell to want to go himself. I still miss it. I didn't take communion, or go as a Catholic. But I went because it was a family tradition, and I loved family traditions. So I think that I too would be grieving.
That being said, perhaps this is part of his journey. When I went to university I went through a fairly lengthy period of being agnostic. From there I was able to forge my own path. Wherever his path may lead, it sounds as if you can feel proud of having raised a son who wishes to think about these things for himself.
poster:Dinah
thread:870414
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081219/msgs/871625.html