Posted by raisinb on July 3, 2008, at 10:05:21
In reply to Re: Has your T said the L word about you?, posted by lucie lu on July 2, 2008, at 22:24:16
Ha, Lucie, I had to laugh at your post. I used to pine and pine for my therapist to give me something, too--I would have killed for a teddy bear!
Then my therapist moved her office, which was extremely upsetting to me (and I wasn't prepared for those feelings). Half-jokingly, I told her I needed a "souvenir" from the old office--a piece of carpet, a snip of wallpaper. Next session, she gave me a paperweight that she uses on all her files and told me to keep it until I felt safe and comfortable in the new place.
I loved it when she did it, and I still do. But you can't imagine all the conflicts that paperweight uncovered. I would look at it on my coffee table and get freaked out, because if I decided to walk out impulsively, I'd still have it, and I'd feel guilty. I also didn't like the little message on it (it seemed cliched, silly). I couldn't figure out where to put it in my house; it didn't mesh with anything I had. I'd picture her showing up and thinking "*this* is where she put my gift?"
It was pretty eye-opening to see all the conflicts I had around accepting what people give me. But I am not sure I want gifts anymore :)
poster:raisinb
thread:837716
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080616/msgs/837823.html