Posted by Racer on October 19, 2007, at 10:59:54
In reply to Touch maybe csa trigger**, posted by antigua3 on October 19, 2007, at 8:51:10
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> also, this may sound funny, but I really don't like anyone touching my hair. I have a huge fear of getting my hair cut because of all the touching.That's funny, because I love having my hair touched, it's very comforting to me. (Although I'm not so fond of having it cut lately, but that's trouble finding a good hairdresser...)
What I can't stand are my breasts -- the focus of my abuse. I hate the way they feel, hanging there when I don't have a bra on. I have always hated it when they were touched or kissed during sex. I hate having someone touch me from behind. I really hate being held from behind when I'm standing up. If someone touches me a certain way from behind, it can leave me quivering and shaking and crying. What's that you ask? Ah, yes, as a matter of fact, that is the central memory for me -- being grabbed from behind, with my arms pinned, and fighting like hell to get away. And not being able to. That, for me, is my central memory -- nothing about anything else that happened, just the part about fighting to get away from him while he had my arms pinned from behind.
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> I also hate, hate, when people stand too close to me in line when I'm shopping. It drives me up a wall.That makes me nuts, too. I live in an area with a lot of Asians, people from cultures where personal space is different from most Western countries. I get crowded in line all the time, and it's awful. I've moved away from some people in lines, only to have them move closer to me again. Now my husband and I do the shopping on Sundays, so there's more room because he's usually behind me in line. Before we started shopping together, I sometimes left the line because of the crowding. I'd just get my stuff back into my cart and leave the line -- and get right back in at the end, so that I'd have space again!
I'm sorry that those things happened to you, Antigua. You deserved much better than that.
poster:Racer
thread:789878
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071009/msgs/790100.html