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Re: Friends are confusing. » Daisym

Posted by Dinah on January 27, 2007, at 9:51:41

In reply to Friends are confusing., posted by Daisym on January 27, 2007, at 0:10:51

Daisy, she might have been trying to help, but I can't see how she thought the second part of what she was saying could possibly be helpful. It even contradicted the first part of what she was saying. :(

There are enough people around this area that believe therapists are a bad idea, and are just out to attach you to them to take your money, that I'm rather used to hearing that. Some people just don't understand long term relationship based therapy, and some people don't understand therapy at all.

I'm glad that what works for her, works for her. That's why there are all different sorts of therapists. A "tough" therapist wouldn't work well for me at all.

But she had no right to speak for your therapist. She said she wouldn't like to be needed, and I rather think she's right about that. But that's a statement about her, not your therapist. And any statements she made that arose from that basic fact about her are reflections of her own thinking, not your therapist's. It's information about her, and information that it's likely useful to have. It has nothing whatsoever to do with your therapist. You have had many discussions with your therapist about this, and he's made it clear enough what he feels and thinks to make her suggestions that you are misunderstanding him moot. It just means that she and your therapist are two very different types of people.

Be glad your therapist is the type he is, and please call him if you're feeling distressed. My therapist would be quite upset if I sat with my feelings all weekend and had them all built up by Monday. He'd want to clarify his position right away, because he'd know the longer it went on the more upset I'd be.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:726973
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070119/msgs/727080.html