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Re: He definitely forgot » Tamar

Posted by Larry Hoover on May 30, 2006, at 7:33:02

In reply to He definitely forgot, posted by Tamar on May 30, 2006, at 4:58:21

> And at that point he said he had forgotten. He actually admitted it.

I'm probably going to upset you even more to say that I'm glad you're this angry. This is good for you, unless you were unable to show any of it to him. I don't mind, knowing about your anger. I quite understand anger.

Thank you for the extra information.

I think there are many kinds of forgetting. He didn't forget, as in not remembering the signficance of what happened to you. He didn't forget what he knew about your need for working on this until it got more comfortable. Coming at it from the other end of meaning, he at least forgot to keep the concept in his working memory. Somewhere there, or in between, lies the truth in his meaning.

Your reaction is not all about him, as I perceive it.

What is wonderful is that you are attached to the stored emotion, so that you can touch it, and work it. Stored emotions never die, but they can kill the container they're in. Bottled up anger hurts the container it's stored in, more than the one that it's poured in. (Within reason.) You've at least got the cork out of your anger bottle.

Anger teaches me that my needs haven't been met. Anger is something I pull over me, like a cloak. The problem is, I can forget why I am angry. I can forget which need(s) were involved. Anger tells me to look at my needs. Do you know, which needs you're angry about?

Lar

 

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poster:Larry Hoover thread:650213
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060526/msgs/650354.html