Posted by Susan47 on October 18, 2005, at 19:13:52
In reply to Re: help, posted by lostinfeelings on October 18, 2005, at 18:48:40
That's really nice, that you needed this and the therapist offered it to you without you even having to ask. I love it that this therapist's in touch with your feelings. Isn't that great? Keep telling us how things happen, because there's a lot of interest on Babble about therapies and the therapist/client relationship. I'm presently seeing a therapist who's doing EMDR with me; at the end of the last session she opened her arms slightly in some welcoming way as she said good-bye, huge huge warm smile and all, and I thought, that's nice that she's willing to do that but it's the last thing I really want, from her! The EMDR we're doing together is just all I need from her. I still don't really like her completely, she's another one of those "doctor"s with a big head. Perhaps when you're constantly helping people get better, and you think that's the most important thing you could be doing, your head just swells naturally. 'Cause that's what I've seen in all therapists, psychiatrists, and MD's. Sometimes their real personality is good enough to overcome a lot of the ugliness of their constantly-proven assertion that they're attractive, wanted, and needed, and helpful. That assertion can look just really ugly and closed-off.
My last T had it, I think, but towards the end, when I believe I wore him down to a bit more honesty, I think his real self managed to whittle its way a bit out of the hard bark he'd covered himself in.
I think a lot of what happens in therapy, maybe even most of it, has to do with the relationship between the two people. But the client has to also learn not to feel bound to take the responsibility for what happens in that relationship. Which is what seems to be happening in almost all of these client/therapist relationships that're suddenly terminated on the part of the therapist.
There's a reason we associate the word "terminate", with death. Not just the end of something, but the end of self.
poster:Susan47
thread:267681
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051018/msgs/568642.html