Posted by bird in the sky on December 17, 2005, at 0:45:46
In reply to Re: help, posted by Susan47 on October 19, 2005, at 20:15:56
I don't know if anyone is continuing this thread. I am curious to know how Jadah is.
I am another one in love with my Therapist. I thought it would gradually diminish but it has not. I guess I don't seem so needy and always thinking of him like i used to, but it seems more real and healthy now, not like obsession but like real love. It's just so depressing to (almost) accept the fact that i won't have an intimate or physical in any way relationship with him. I get so excited just with the thought that we could hug and what it would feel like to be mutual. I am so close to him and i believe i know him pretty well too. I've never had this before and i just can't hardly stand the idea that it's just an hour that i pay for. It's not a real relationship, though nothing has ever felt this real. Last time he said he had been thnking of me a lot and my feelings for him and his for me ("after all, i am human") and how he's glad i'm getting better. I am taking this out of context a little, but just to think he has feelings for me too, yet will not allow us to express them at all is pretty torturous. It has been a little over a year and a half i have been having these strong feelings for him and it doesn't seem to have a purpose for me. I have mixed feelings and want to see him less maybe, but i don't know if he'll go for that. Of course i would want to see him more, but all i do (just about) is talk about my love and desire for him. I know he would miss me too if i stopped seeing him. Is this supposed to be healing me? The original problem i went for has gotten a lot better and now problems with my husband i feel funny talking about because i have the feeling like my therapist is my boyfriend and wouldn't want to talk about my husband. Oh, i am sorry to have wasted your time... it really is a big thing to me even tho it may not sound like it. bird
poster:bird in the sky
thread:267681
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051216/msgs/589733.html