Posted by Jadah on August 3, 2005, at 16:44:40
In reply to Re: Susan, posted by Jadah on August 3, 2005, at 16:32:38
well, i did it. I made and followed through with an appointment with a new T. It is a women, ive never worked with a woman before (mom issues). I usually always sought out men to fullfill my father figure issues. I felt like I was betraying my t. He doesnt know about my appt. She was nice but I was so nervous and she talks alot, over me sometimes and I feel rushed to get my sentences out. I do not know if this will be a good fit but my rule of thumb is to go for three sessions before judging or making a decision. I told her everything after carefully probing her to find out how safe and secure everything would be. She promised that she would not tell, we agreed to change his name. It felt good just to get it off my chest to get rid of this secret. Obviously she doesnt agree with the situation but she is open to hearing it and helping me. I felt kind of defensive for him, reassuring her all the time that he wasnt just out for sex and that he does indeed love me, hes not a bad person.... it was so hard and confusing. I felt embarrassed. I felt like a backstabber. She knows that, if i had things my way that I would not leave him but that against my wishes it will inevitably end. Thats why I told her I was there, to make sure I have a solid foundation that I will be able to stand on my own two feet without him. Any suggestions or input as to how you think this T will work out? I know I will never be able to replace him, no T will ever be able to give me the love and support I need. Its really hard to compromise when youve been to the other end of the spectrum.
poster:Jadah
thread:531728
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050801/msgs/537178.html