Posted by daisym on July 3, 2005, at 19:59:29
In reply to Still torn - longish, posted by Shortelise on July 3, 2005, at 18:05:33
It all sounds so hard.
The way I approach people when I feel like I don't know how to make them understand what I'm saying is to ask them to go first and be me. I ask them to explain "my side" before they explain why my side is wrong. I might also ask them to explain my potential feelings.
Your therapist might resist. But if you went in and started with, "this is very very hard for me because I'm not sure how to help you understand why all this hurts so much. Or maybe I think I have to PROVE to you that my feelings are real and I've never had to PROVE things to you before. Maybe you could go first and tell me what you think is happening for me, what you hear me saying and what you think I might be feeling and why. Then I could see where the disconnect is and try to clarify my feelings again."
I think it is important that you try to go and try to stay. At least one more time. I'm sure that both of you don't want things to end like this. I wish I could go with you and just offer you strength and calm. It *is* so hard to talk when engulfed in these really intense emotions.
I'm sure it is going to be a long two weeks for you.
Hugs,
Daisy
poster:daisym
thread:523054
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050628/msgs/523099.html