Posted by shrinking violet on August 26, 2004, at 14:36:28
Hi everyone,
I apologize for posting something so self-serving, and I *hate* that I feel this way, but.....my T just called to reschedule our Monday appointment due to problems with her mother (she's in a nursing home, and has been ill periodically). We rescheduled for next Thursday, which is "only" a week away, but...I was just barely holding it together as it was, trying to convince myself that Monday isn't that far off, and now this. I feel horribly guilty, because I know my T's Mom needs more of her attention right now, and I'm sure my T doesn't want to have these personal issues to deal with, but......why is it so hard in-between sessions now? I've been seeing my T every week for over a year, we're close (which seems to increase with every session), but why am I more emotional and feel more needy in-between sessions now? Shouldn't that have happened in the beginning?
And please dont mention the T word ("transference"); I don't think I have that with my T, and I question how often it actually occurs vs how often a client is said to be going through it. I don't think my T is really "into" that whole school of thought, anyway, and she has repeatedly said that our connection, etc is very real and genuine (and I need to believe that).
I hate this. And I can't really tell her how I feel (she knows, we mentioned it a bit last session, but I don't think she understands), and I feel I really need to try to stay away from her (not email, or call) now because I know she has a lot going on with her Mom; besides, what can she really do or say to make it easier? Nothing, I guess.
This stinks. :(
Sorry.
-SV
poster:shrinking violet
thread:382595
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040821/msgs/382595.html