Posted by shrinking violet on August 30, 2004, at 12:45:41
In reply to Re: 4 more days.....feels like a year, posted by crazymaisie on August 30, 2004, at 1:37:04
>> an up-side occurs to me though - when you do actually see her on thursday it will only be four more days untill monday, instead of a week.
Well, nice try, but...every week we choose a new day/time. Usually I try to keep it the same day or time every week, but sometimes it isn't possible. I'm actually going to try to keep our appts to Thursdays from now on, since I have school, etc earlier in the week. Thanks for the thought, though!
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>> i HATE when something like that happens beyond my control. especially about something important to me. i don't know if that's part of what's upsetting you. do you want to say more about what came up in the last session that you want to bring up with her? feel free to spill it all out.Hm, now that you mention the control issue, that might be a huge part of it also (I have HUGE control issues). Lately, too, I've been afraid that sessions will be cancelled, or I'll show up and she won't be there, and so when she DID call that fear became realized...and there wasn't anything I could do about it. Thank you for bringing that up, I might discuss that with her next time.
As for what was brought up....mainly maternal issues. I'm not close to my family AT ALL, in any way, and they have no concept as to who I am. I've always wished I was adopted, and waited for my "real" family to come get me (I'm 31 y/o now, although emotionally I'm a lot younger). Last session my T was talking about how I was younger, and how if I had said to her, "Mommy,......." that she would have paid attention to me, etc and she would have loved to have had that conversation with me, etc. So her saying that I think triggered this whole maternal "wish" that I have, and part of me wondered why she (meaning someone like her) couldn't have been my mother, etc. So I know I need to bring this up with her, and she'll probably love it since I usually avoid dealing with any of these things directly, but at the same time I don't want her to feel uncomfortable in thinking I have some kind of maternal attachment/transference for her, because I don't. She's nothing like my mother, thankfully. lol. All in all, it isn't a huge thing, I guess, but it is for me because this would be the first time where I really talk about my past and how it affects me.
>> i'm sorry to that you're feeling so angry with yourself. i don't know much about you, but i like you already. i always check your posts first on this board and you have alot of good advice for people and you seem very warm and kind-hearted.
Aw, ((((maisie))) this was SO incredibly sweet of you to say. It really means a lot that you would say and think that of me. Thank you.
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>> i hope you're doing better by the time you read this.A bit. "only" 3 more days.....lol.
Thanks hon.
-SV
poster:shrinking violet
thread:382595
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040828/msgs/384146.html