Posted by alexandra_k on April 15, 2019, at 20:12:17
In reply to Hi Alex, posted by beckett2 on March 27, 2019, at 23:27:25
Hi Beckett,
Thanks for wondering :-)
I am doing okay. I was homeless for a while which was pretty scary, actually, but I have a nice 1 bedroom apartment, now, which I love.
I am trying to finish up my thesis, which is scary. I think it is supposed to be scary. I mean to say I think people are pleased about the fact that it is scary because they feel that that is the way that that is supposed to be.
I am applying for Med again, next year. It is the last year I can apply, ever, so it will simply have to be a successful application.
I am feeling old and tired, sometimes. Sometimes I feel resentful that this country would not offer me a better life. That all this country has offered me so far is so very very very much less than 'average' even, for all the years I've laboured towards attaining knowledge to help make this place better for a greater proportion of us -- that simply is not valued, at all.
But thinking that way doesn't help me. Doesn't help people want to help me or whatever. So...
Perhaps it is... I forget what it is called... When you hospitalise someone and expect to see immediate improvement for having them someplace safe with sources of stress alleviated by way of respite but instead of they deteriorate... Rebound phenomenon or something. Because they finally have a place safe enough for them to collapse properly.
I feel a bit like that.
Indignation etc is really not what I can afford to be feeling right now...
Anyway...
Something went right for me to get this place, I guess. And I have some funds to get some new clothes, which will help really rather a lot, actually.
How are you Beckett?
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1103714
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/poli/20190413/msgs/1103994.html