Posted by allisonross on November 4, 2005, at 13:44:56
In reply to Re: I'm with AdaGrace, posted by sunny10 on October 11, 2005, at 7:35:21
>Hi, Sunny! I am Pretty new here (hardly used at all, LOL!).
my son is doing all right, actually. It's quite surprising since my ex-husband lost his job (again) and then they both got kicked out of my ex's wife's house... Now she wants a divorce.
How awful.!
>
> They have just this weekend moved back into my ex's childhood home. There is animosity between my ex and his brother- fighting over whose house it is since their parents are deceased... Of course, the brother has somewhere else to live and my ex and son don't!How traumatic for your son.
>
> There is a chance that my ex will take a job in Atlanta, Georgia. My son doesn't want to move, but I think it would actually be good for him. My son decided last year that he is bisexual (I'm not sure one can know that at 13 with low self-esteem) and he made the mistake of telling all of his friends at school. Now school is even more difficult with the teasing than it ever was.How unbelievably sad for him. To trust, and then have it violated in such a terrible way. He must be so confused.
Do they have a counselor at school? Can he get into counseling now? That would be immensely helpful.
A new school might be just what the doctor ordered!!
>
> And throughout this, my son is a complete champ. He is doing well at school after a difficult start with a tough teacher (his first experience with a tough one!). He seems to have developed a talent for making new friends, so he is pretty happy- all things considered.Must be because he has such a great mom!
And I'm happy that he is suddenly so good at making friends- that means he can do so in Atlanta, too, if he needs to.
>
> As far as how I would feel being so far away, well, first off, they might be in Atlanta anyway, no matter where I am. Secondly, if I got my son to visit during his school holidays, we would actually have some quality time together instead of the few hours here and there that we see each other now!
>
> I am doing okay with the love part, Susan, didn't mean to worry you. I am just too dependent because I feel like I need someone to love me in order to live. And that can't be true, so I'd like to unlearn the "need" for love.I have always felt that way. Spent a whole lifetime abandoned by men. First by my father (never knew him).
We ALL need to be loved; every human on the planet. There is no way to "unlearn" that, and what a tragedy it would be, it we could/did.
I'd rather
> want it and get it, than "need" it and chase men away! I'm doing pretty good at ignoring the need part and just enjoying the want part right now...Wow, I wish I could enjoy the NEED part right now (divorced after 31 years of abuse); been alone for only 5 months, but fortunately, my resilience, and wicked wit and sense of humor, and faith, have stood me in good stead! It's a ahhhh, physical problem, doncha know!
you can read my story. i was published (amazingly) on a psychiatric on-line journal:
www.psychiatricjournal.com
Entitled: The Transcendent Child on Overcoming Verbal and Spiritual Abuse (for the whole sordid story, LOL!
www.churchabusepoetrytherapy.com
(the result of being voted out of my church, because I got a divorce): The Highlight? having my name put on a big screen, followed by the words: CONDUCT UNBECOMING A CHILD OF GOD.
> Anyway, I'd better get back to work.
What do you do?
>
> By the way, I'd love to stop there for a week on the way, but I promised my SO that I would be rock climbing with him on the way!! I'd schedule a solo trip after getting where I'm going and landing a job so I can pay for that next trip!!
>
> Bye, love, talk to you later,
> Sunny10
>
Love your Sunny name.Love to chat with you via e-mail: kinda lonely
Hugs and love to you, and grins, Ally
(wacalice@aol.com)
poster:allisonross
thread:563598
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20051022/msgs/575385.html