Posted by Reggie BoStar on November 5, 2005, at 18:48:37
In reply to Non-12 Step, posted by CleverGuy on November 1, 2005, at 0:15:42
Hi CleverGuy,
I currently use a combination of AA and dual-diagnosis groups (substance abuse + behavioral health, e.g. depression in my case).BUT: I unconditionally support anyone who explores 12-step alternatives and/or any other means of staying sober. The important thing is to find something that you feel comfortable with and works for YOU, regardless of what it is.
Here's what I did: I also explored alternatives such as Rational Recovery, SMART, "Beyond the 12 Steps", Eastern philosophy, just about anything I could get access to.
It turns out that I'm the type of person who likes to get together and chat with other folks who share the same issues, mainly because they're the only ones who really understand what it's all about. Even AA people will tell you this: only other alcoholics really have a good understanding of alcohol addiction and everything that goes along with it.
This is the only reason I didn't like Rational Recovery. It's a good method, well thought-out, and is no doubt great stuff for a rationalist who knows how to go it alone. All power and success to those folks.
As far as SMART goes: from what I've seen, SMART is essentially "Rational Recovery with Meetings." As such it would be right up my alley, because I really do need to shoot the sh*t about this. The only reason I don't go to SMART meetings in my area is because there aren't any. If there were, I would certainly do both AA and SMART.
For similar reasons I backed away from the Eastern philosophy approaches ("Tao of Sobriety" et al). The concepts and the literature are fantastic, and I read the stuff all the time; but there just isn't anybody around here to talk to face-to-face about it.
The need to talk to other people steered me towards AA, simply because there are tons of groups near where I live. So here's what I did to compromise between all the different methods, 12-step or otherwise: I shopped around. I went to as many AA meetings as I could, until out of the many different types of meetings there are around here, I find a few smaller ones whose members were all sensible people. Many of them consider the "Higher Power" and/or "Spiritual Experience" to be a state of mind, originating internally - not externally. Religion, surrender, and all of the other concepts that tend to alienate independent thinkers from AA are not in the minds of these folks. Rather, they use an approach that amounts to accessing a potential that's in each one of them - not an external divine being of any sort.
There are more people in AA who think this way than is commonly believed. I discovered this by chatting with AA meeting goers before, after, and during breaks in the meetings. I basically just asked them, "What do you really feel about this", in reference to concepts of "God" and spirituality. Some responded with party-line religion. Some, however, told me what I just wrote in the last paragraph. After that, I just looked for AA meetings wherein the "state of mind" belief about the "Higher Power" was in the majority.
It was surprisingly easy.
So, in a nushell, here's what I do:
1. AA meetings in which most folks think the way I do about an internal "higher power" or state of mind. It can be done.
2. Dual diagnosis therapy groups (the FREE ones, naturally!). In those types of groups, "spirituality" is only one of many tools used to deal with substance abuse and behavioural health issues. This is where you can get a lot of info about different types of therapy, medications, natural solutions, etc. In addition, most of the other participants are not necessarily AA members.
3. Regular visits to my shrink/therapist support network. I have to do this in order to treat severe depression and migraines.
I hope you find this lengthy tirade useful. And by all means, if you can find help with ANY type of sobriety program - self-help like Rational Recovery, secular group support like SMART (if there are any meetings in your area), free dual-diagnosis type therapy groups, and the RIGHT kind of AA meeting - then DO IT. Never give up. Keep looking until you find the one that works for YOU.
Good luck, CleverGuy !!!
PS: post anything you find that looks interesting. I'm always on the prowl for good programs in addition to what I already do, and I always will be.
Take care my friend,
Reggie BoStar
poster:Reggie BoStar
thread:573995
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20050914/msgs/575735.html