Posted by Deneb on September 23, 2010, at 12:41:08
In reply to Re: I finally stopped eating! » Deneb, posted by Dinah on September 23, 2010, at 10:01:50
I really am afraid that pdoc will think I am fat. She even said I could lose a few pounds. It is kind of irrational I know. I just don't want to be labeled as overweight. I think I want to impress pdoc with my willpower, even though I realize she would be more impressed by me facing the world and starting my career. I am facing the world now though. I have an employment specialist working to help me now.
I am afraid of getting out into the "real world" and growing up. I also feel out of control right now and controlling my eating makes me feel better.
As to posting about my ultra low calorie diet here, sometimes I think that people will support me and be happy for me that I have so much willpower. I'm also just posting for my own information. I find this thread very useful in figuring about what I did on a certain date. It is my journal.
Pdoc didn't say don't lose weight, she just told me not to go overboard with the restricting because it will lead to binging and I will gain weight. I'm also not going to restrict to 300 kcal for the long term. I know that would be crazy and if I did that I would eventually die. I just want to restrict a lot for 5 days so I can make up for the huge binges I did in 5 days.
I'm also a really confused person. I know rationally what the healthy way to loss weight is, but somehow I go back to the maladaptive ways. It is really messed up.
poster:Deneb
thread:955008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20100907/msgs/963475.html