Posted by gardenergirl on March 28, 2004, at 14:36:15
In reply to Re: To clarify » gardenergirl, posted by octopusprime on March 28, 2004, at 12:17:46
Hi OP,
No you didn't offend me. I enjoy dialogs such as this. You pegged me quite correctly. I always tend to blame myself. Usually I catch it, but for some reason in this case, I didn't. Thanks for the challenge! :)I have actually known her at least casually for three years. We have shared an office at the clinic now for about seven months. It has never been that bad until now. I am trying to attribute it to some additional stress she is under. There is a major deadline for her next week, one of those career make or breakers. She usually appears to be so calm and cool, as she did with her dissertation proposal. But perhaps she is really struggling or anxious about this one.
Her behavior with her clients just bugs me because I think it reflects poorly on the whole center. I have heard her cancel clients' sessions so that she could go to lunch with a group. I was so appalled. But she has her own standards. I think my comment about damage control is just my rant in general about bad T's giving the rest of us a bad name.
The eggshell part, I think, is more because of her over the top reaction (great way to frame it, thank you.) You just never seem to know what will set her off or be thrown back into your face. I really don't think that it's because she is black. In fact, when things were going well, she was trying to teach me some ghetto slang, which was hilarious for us both. (I just can't say it right, sigh.) And I have found that when I catch myself saying or asking something that she might perceive as racially insensitive, I check it out with her. Up til now I really have learned a lot from her. And when she had her moods in the past and was ignoring everyone, I found it best to just give her space. That seemed to work out okay.
I think it will get better. You know, the more I process this, the less intense it seems, at least for me. I will see B and C tonight and see where they are at, emotionally and rationally.
I am tempted to send her an email stating that I am open to talking when or if she feels it would be helpful. But I don't know. I'll probably just gauge by how tomorrow and Tuesday go.
Thanks for the insights! Where should I send the payment? :)
gg
poster:gardenergirl
thread:329117
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040324/msgs/329495.html