Posted by Mal on July 27, 2005, at 20:40:44
In reply to Re: porn?, posted by caraher on July 27, 2005, at 14:33:17
> From my male perspective it's really about respect, not prudery. If you're not comfortable that should seal it. It would be selfish to coerce someone you love into doing something s/he is not comfortable with.
>
> Other comments... I disagree that any man would share them. Many would, sure, perhaps even most. But I've done something like this and destroyed the evidence, entirely on my own initiative, for the many reasons already mentioned and without "sharing" any of it with the world.
>
> I'm glad your refusal did not turn into a point of contention. I agree that you should accept it as a compliment and be glad that he is understanding and respectful of your wishes. If you want to "indulge his fantasies" to some degree make sure you do so on terms *you* are comfortable with. It would be bad to feel that you just "gave in" and did something which might later breed resentment toward himYOu are sooo right. And I AM glad he is understanding. There have been other, totally unrelated issues that he has said, "I don't want you to resent me for this, so have it your way", and I am sure he feels the same way about this issue. And I have said the same to him about things. We are not in a power struggle; we both know it isn't healthy to MAKE the other do something. In fact, we both have pretty strong personalities- we couldn't MAKE one another do ANYthing we didn't want to do! LOL
Thank you for your thoughtful reply!!
Have a great evening!
MAL
poster:Mal
thread:533956
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050724/msgs/534480.html