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Re: Stereotypes » AdaGrace

Posted by Larry Hoover on May 28, 2005, at 18:56:35

In reply to Re: Stereotypes » Larry Hoover, posted by AdaGrace on May 27, 2005, at 7:51:23

> I realize that my post is very stereotypical.
> I do not mean to say that ALL men are like this.

Ya, and I knew you weren't talking about me. You don't know anything about me.

> However, having said that, I find it typical of the men I have known or now know. Perhaps it is location. Perhaps it is only my situation. I don't know. I just know my own experiences and those of my friends and aquaintances. I find it disturbing and wanted to vent.

I hope I didn't disturb that. I'm not offended by that at all. Your experience is your experience. It is very hard, though, to discuss me in the context of a stereotype, no matter how I try to do it.....I end up being very careful about language and meaning. And it ends up sounding defensive or protective.

> I realize that there are men out there, like you, who aren't like my descriptions.

Thanks. I like to think that's true.

> I just didn't meet you in my formative years, therefore I have gained a somewhat negative outlook on the male species I guess. It's sad really. I feel as if I have so much to offer intelectually, physically, emotionally, etc., but challenged for trying to do that. Anyway.

That makes me sad.

> I know stereotypes are bad to express. I need a new way to vent maybe.
>
> AdaGrace

I'm struggling with making what I want to say clear and concise. I find it hard, as an individual, one who happens to have a penis, to join into a discussion which involves male stereotypes. Stereotypes exist for good reason. They have a basis in fact. The difficulty is in making the discussion personal and individual, without addressing the stereotypical stuff too heavily. The upside of stereotypes is they save a lot of words. They're symbolic. The downside is that they are symbolic. Highly symbolic words carry a lot of emotional baggage.

I agree that the stereotypical male you were speaking of is not one who promotes a high-quality emotionally interactive supportive and non-judgmental relationship.

It does make me wonder, though, and as you seemed to wonder too.....just how much location and situation affect the observations you and your friends have made.

Lar

 

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poster:Larry Hoover thread:500245
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