Posted by lonelygal2 on February 7, 2005, at 10:50:45
In reply to Re: wanting motherly love - for LonelyGal, posted by QuietHeart on February 7, 2005, at 0:53:25
everything you said makes perfect sense to me. wanting to be loved and accepted and mothered can be such a powerful feeling for me too, and it sort of makes sense that you would want to exaggerate to hook her in... and maybe you feel like your problems aren't important enough to be given such caring.. b/c you never had that... which may add to your feeling that you would need to exaggerate too to get someone to care..
i guess there are no easy answers. and with your boss, i totally understand your feelings, but i would warn you to be very careful b/c she is your boss... are you in therapy? i never really talked about this directly with my old t, but we always did talk about my relationship with my mom, and i did get very attached to her (the t), and i think she knew why, and umm, well maybe the best place to address this would be in therapy.
i dunno... if i was around women i would probably do the same thing, but all my mentors, or profs i work with now, are men, and well, i would never talk to a man in a million years about any of this, so i'm sort of sure i won't get into this kind of trouble right now... but not having a surrogate mother at all right now, is umm, well tough.> I absolutely feel this way. I am a professional and feel I need the support to be free in myself that another professional woman can provide. Also, I definitely DON'T crave a closer relationship w my mom. That chapter is sort of closed. I like my mom, just don't feel there is too much poential for anything more than we have. But with my current boss, who is a very powerful woman, I CRAVE for her to take me under her wing and give me sepcial attention, hug me, sympathize with me. Sometimes I think of even exaggerating whatever my reality is a little bit to hook her in and garner her sympathy. is this so terrible? I just so much want guidance and nruturance from a professional woman. Any other thoughts, LonelyGal? thanks for writing
poster:lonelygal2
thread:453411
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20041223/msgs/454293.html