Posted by fleeting flutterby on March 7, 2009, at 16:51:15
In reply to Re: Sexual Misconduct/ What my T has said and Done » fleeting flutterby, posted by SLS on March 7, 2009, at 14:27:47
> I just do not make a habit of denying my male traits.<<
-----flutterby: I think they are HUMAN traits but with centuries of suppression, women have been conditioned, sadly, to deny them. (IMO) I believe if a female was raised in a similar sexual encouraging environment as a male, they would have similar sexual traits.
> > In our current culture males are allowed and most times encouraged to indulge in the "eye candy" activity...
>> I don't know that women are discouraged from doing this. Well, I would hope not, anyway.<<------flutterby: You've not come across the men I have. I've been told that it's NOT right for a woman to goggle over a man's body. And when asked, most men have told me they would NOT like the idea of women looking at men naked in magazines and getting their "offs" from it.... but that it's completely understandable and acceptable for men to do such.
>> I have no problem with it. Do you remember the Chippendales Dancers? What was the attraction there for women? I don't profess to know all of the reasons, but certainly women enjoy eye-candy too.>>
-----flutterby: You are more open minded than the men I've known. Did you know that most of the Chippendale dancers were gay? Yep, I don't think most straight guys are that open to making themselves so vulnerable. and have you ever wondered why their wasn't a boom of such clubs for women to go to? I venture to guess that it's partly because they can't find men that want to subject themselves to this and also a lot of women feel they are being so horribly bad for partaking in it.(this culture has deep seated roots with puritan christianism that has settled in our culture in ways that most people will never see or realize- IMO. Yikes! I hope I've not violated something here at babble by stating this.... I just don't always understand the rules here)
> Males and females are different.<<----flutterby: YES I so agree-- different can be very good too! However, I also believe that some males can be more feminine than some females and vise-versa.
> I understand your "logic" versus "emotional" dichotomy. There is also a bit of a dichotomy in that men are more linear in their thinking while women tend to consider multiple perceptions simultaneously. Women are much better at multitasking than are men. This is just the beginning of quite a list of differences.<<------flutterby: Yes, I understand that too.
> "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus" is a great thesis on the way these difference manifest psychologically and communicatively.<<-----flutterby: Yes, I've read that book.
>> I am equally resistent to the idea that we should be politically correct and not recognize the differences between the sexes that science has reinforced exist.<<------ flutterby: while I do believe that differences exist, I've learned that there is a spectrum of femaleness and maleness..... and some of us are way over on the female side, and others are somewhat near the middle(meaning just as much male as female) and still others are way over on the male side. I saw a study once where a group was tested and the woman that drove a bulldozer and was in the army was in the middle of the spectrum and a guy that wrote poetry and modeled was also near the middle. where the woman that was a teacher and sold make-up part time tested way over on the female side and the man that raced cars and was a mechanic was way on the male spectrum.
----- I think that may be why people get upset with science trying to put us neatly in a female "box" or male "box". there are just too many varieties to do that and it's upsetting to those that don't feel they fit in the box.
> I am offended when women are treated like sex objects with no other intrinsic value. I particularly abhor the TV commercials that are shown during football season.<<------ flutterby: again, I think you are very open and insightful(if you don't mind me saying so)
> I am a great admirer of women. I wasn't taught to be that way. I just see what I see - differences. I like to celebrate the differences that exist beneath the flesh.<<----- flutterby: OH that sounds lovely. I like to think I'm the same way.(about admiring men) I was told over and over how dumb men are and useless. and my mom would tell me what a loser my dad was. but I never wanted to believe all that competely. I always believed there is a reason for our differences-- I like to think they compliment each other. Like having spaghetti without the sauce, or chocolate chip cookies without the chips-- male and female can go very well together if we just appreciate what each one has to offer.
> What I don't understand about the differences between the sexes is less important than recognizing that those differences exist.<<
-----flutterby: hmmmmm... I beg to differ on this. Understanding leads to acceptance and compassion.... I think that is how the KKK got so strong-- without understanding of differences.... that is partly how prejudism gets a strangle hold, and sexism etc... etc... seems not understanding can lead to wrong interpretations which lead to some being hurt and treated wrongly.-----hey, thanks for the conversing.... it's nice to share with an open mind. :o)
flutterby- mandy ...oops!! oh dear, Sassy have I hijacked your thread? Oh I'm sorry... I hope you're not feeling upset. should I have started a new thread? I don't know.... thank you.
poster:fleeting flutterby
thread:884087
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090227/msgs/884285.html