Posted by lucie lu on October 21, 2008, at 16:33:38
In reply to Re: Just out of sorts, possible trigger » lucie lu, posted by rskontos on October 20, 2008, at 21:05:22
Rsk, actually you did make very good sense.
OK you may bite me on the leg for this, but I just wonder whether some of your "funky" mood has something to do with where you are in your therapy. (Not eliminating the contributions from your in-laws, who would put anyone in a funk.) I have a sense that you are actually considering the possibility of letting your T in, and getting started on some of the more in-depth stuff, you are just afraid, and understandably so. I suspect you really like your T and he, you, but the whole job seems so tough that it's hard to believe anything good might come of it. But you must suspect that it would, or you wouldn't be in therapy, right?
About the slippery slope (and not all have to do with sex)... I think that how an experienced T (which yours certainly sounds like) will approach things is rather like the way an experienced guide will take serious mountain climbers to the top of a serious mountain (e.g. Everest). I know someone, a friend of a friend, who does this for a living and it is amazing, she is about 60 and she doesn't look like a world-class athlete but she takes people up all of the most challenging peaks in the world. She's "done" Everest several times. She says fitness is important, but 95% is preparation, preparation, preparation. And then more preparation. OK, back to the point... the way they do this is in stages, and it's all about survival. They go so far in a day and then they make base camp. To make the camp element-proof and avoid depleting their energies (which could be fatal in the Himalayas), they spend more time making base camp and preparations than climbing. They also rest so their bodies can slowly acclimate to the increasing altitutude. They may actually stay there a day or more, depending upon the weather. The ultimate goal here is always to survive the climb. Then when they're ready and the weather accommodates, they climb up another segment and then make another camp. They keep doing this all the way up. If there are any problems, they go back down some and regroup. I think you can see where I'm going with this metaphor. If your T is an experienced guide, he will help you explore your past in a similar way. Get to one point safely and then regroup, make base camp, acclimate to the altitude. Only when all systems are go do you attempt the next climb. It is totally reasonable for you to fear having things come at you before you are prepared to handle them and have all the necessary tools. That would be fatal in mountain-climbing as well. Remember it's all about preparation and taking time to consolidate - and it is absolutely imperative to always have a stable base camp to return to.
If I'm off-base, rsk, then at least you have learned something interesting about mountain climbing (lol). But if you really might be considering the climb, maybe you can talk to your T about how it can be done safely and in stages and what safety equipment and expertise will be needed along the way. I'm sure he would understand the metaphor.
Lucie
poster:lucie lu
thread:858429
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081018/msgs/858618.html