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Re: The Intimate Hour -----

Posted by DAisym on January 25, 2008, at 15:18:33

In reply to Re: The Intimate Hour ----- » Daisym, posted by JoniS on January 25, 2008, at 7:11:03

(((Joni)))

I know you feel abandoned. But does it help at all to recognize that your therapist got "sick" and he just doesn't haven't in him to help you right now? (Or even, anymore?) I'm not saying you should go back -- perhaps it is time to find a new therapist or choose this ending point for yourself. And he didn't handle it very well -but that indicates how much he needed to take a leave, because he wasn't doing his job well. Too many therapist, I think, keep treating when they shouldn't.

I'm also not saying you shouldn't be upset or mad. I'd be hurting too, and angry at how unfair life is. Don't minimize these feelings as you hang on to the good things that happened for you over the years with this therapist. I think you have it right - you have been "abandoned" but it is an abandonment by necessity and filled with regret on his part.

In so many ways unexpected, bad endings in therapy are like a death. I'm hoping you know in your toes that this is all about him and not about the work you were doing together.

Have you read "Undercurrents?" - I've always wondered how her patients dealt with her absence. She describes how her partner helps her write a letter to her clients and closes down her practice because she becomes too depressed to work. But she never says what the response was.

Working through loss takes time. Allow yourself to grieve. Pamper yourself some. Keep writing if it helps.

 

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poster:DAisym thread:808704
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080114/msgs/808889.html