Posted by Happyflower on January 24, 2008, at 15:57:06
In reply to Re: The Intimate Hour ----- (long), posted by DAisym on January 24, 2008, at 13:52:00
> I've read this book but I don't quite get what she means by "hangman's work." Is this forcing the ending? Or is this always being the one who has to move beyond the good feelings of love and look at the issues themselves?
I haven't read the book, but to me maybe it means that after you establish that great relationship where it has done so much good, you have end the relationship and allow the client to move on, even if you as T worked so hard to do it, and have good feelings for that person too.
My T says that he is always working hard to be unemployed. He is working to get me to not need his help anymore, so he is fired.
> The most fascinating part for me is the transference of outside problems and issues onto the therapy itself. Not just the feelings for the therapist, but the whole thing - getting there on time, making time for it in the first place - being honest with yourself - being brave and speaking your truth - value for our money - self-advocacy...and on and on. Therapy represents a place to "do" and to "discuss" so many mundane things that we do or don't do well every day.
>
> But all that said, I agree that if you can get past the hurt of unrequited love, the relationship itself can be very healing.
poster:Happyflower
thread:808704
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080114/msgs/808743.html