Posted by Daisym on January 24, 2008, at 22:39:29
In reply to Re: The Intimate Hour ----- (long) » DAisym, posted by JoniS on January 24, 2008, at 18:51:27
I think you are probably both right about the hangman referring to the ending.
You know Joni, I don't necessarily think labeling something as transference means that they are discounting it. (Actually, I don't think using the term "transference" is helpful for patients, I don't know why therapists feel the need to do that.) I guess it is an attempt to help us understand the process intellectually. I know as a married woman interacting with a married man, I can't imagine any other situation in which these feelings would ever arise and be allowed, let alone talked about. But just because these feelings have a name doesn't make them less real. And I think the majority of therapist in this day and age know that. Perhaps putting them in the category of transference is supposed to make it clear that we explore these feelings instead of acting upon them.
And I totally agreed with what you wrote about the relationship being the vehicle for change. In the safety of the relationship we can dare to think in different ways about ourselves and we can borrow needed strength or courage to do something the perhaps is too hard alone. From what you've written about your therapist, I think he sounds like a relationship-based therapy kind of guy. But I think many therapist don't explore the relationship unless the patient brings it up - they wait, not wanting to presume perhaps. I'm not sure.
And taking him off the pedestal isn't necessarily a bad thing. It is hard to have a close, real relationship with someone who towers above you.
poster:Daisym
thread:808704
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080114/msgs/808805.html