Posted by Dinah on April 9, 2007, at 1:30:10
In reply to Re: Whats the point..??????????????????????????????? » frida, posted by antigua on April 8, 2007, at 21:03:19
But what I have read reminded me of this post I recently came across.
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040303/msgs/321437.html
I found it very useful when I was negotiating that phase of our relationship, and I still find it useful.
Thanks gardenergirl.
Incidentally, there is no way after all this time and all we've been through that I could ever consider that there isn't a very real relationship there, even if it's constrained by therapy rules. I do love him dearly, without mistaking that love for anything but what it is. And in his own way, I think he's fond of me too, although he'd never say the L word. At the very least, he cares for me and values our relationship for more than the income stream (although I'd be a fool to think he doesn't value the income stream as well).
If I ever doubt it, I only have to think about how his manner has shifted from a careful therapeutic neutrality to occasional nagging and irritation when he doesn't think I'm doing what's best for me - before he remembers (or is reminded) that he's not my mother.
Which doesn't mean he won't abandon me if he needs to for the good of his family or for his good. But I do think he'd feel sorry about it.
poster:Dinah
thread:747905
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070406/msgs/748320.html