Posted by llrrrpp on August 29, 2006, at 5:07:42
In reply to (((((((((((((((((((((((((El))))))))))))))))))))))), posted by muffled on August 28, 2006, at 22:30:55
El,
you are showing yourself to be so strong through this incredible ordeal. A lesser person would have given in already, but you are fighting the romantic entanglement. Even though you're going to your appts, your T is sensing that you're not a willing participant in this particular relationship, and he's getting desparate. Well, stay strong. Remember to listen to your feelings. If you only wanted to be punished, you would have submitted a long time ago. I think you are learning what true love is, in the cruelest way possible- by counterexample. If your T loved you the way you deserved, you wouldn't be scared of him, and he wouldn't be manipulating you. Nope. His "love" for you is completely one-sided, selfish, and self-destructive.You always say stuff about how you're afraid you'll "infect" people. Well, think about all the therapeutic relationships you've had to date-- the people who treated you kindly in your treatment, and in particular your ladydoc. You haven't infected them, and you haven't infected us either.
I think it's much more likely that your current "T" has infected you with a sense of doubt and insecurity, in order to weaken you to a point where you will be dependent on him for every single decision you make. You are wise to resist.
Here's some more support for the strength you need this week. count me in, I'm on Team Elaine.
-ll
poster:llrrrpp
thread:680627
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060826/msgs/681083.html