Posted by B2chica on June 22, 2006, at 9:37:51
In reply to Re: I give up! ******S.I. TRIGGER*******, posted by Karolina on June 21, 2006, at 23:44:22
oh ((((((((((Elaine)))))))))))))
i SOOOOOOOO wish i could be with you right now in person. i'm angry frustrated and hurt for you. i can feel your pain in your post.
but please...know you ARE WORTH IT. you didn't waste anything.
and i do agree with fallsfall, i think you should call that office asap and request an appointment today.You did EVERYTHING right. you made a decision, you prepared yourself, you were on time, you were more than patient. and even though it didn't hellp you were able to recognize that you weren't ready to go home and you went further to get help. This ALL shows your instincts are right on. i'm So sorry no one helped you. annierose is right on...the System Failed YOU!!
and about your SI. don't even worry about it here. i've been there so long i can't even count the terrible scars i have. it's not a great coping mechanism but right at that time it was the only one that worked. don't beat yourself up about it. just take care of your wounds, disinfect them, keep them clean and dress them. i understand the impulse, the anger, the hurt the confusion, and the frustration of action when things calm down. and you Should be proud that it had been four months, that IS a long time to not SI and you Should be proud! now lets try for another four, ok?
i know it seems like an impossible task. but now is the time to be as assertive as you possibly can for your own sake. call that doctors office and tell them that it is extremely important that you see her, tell them it has to do with your mental health and you are having concerns about safety. let them know this isn't just a hi i'm doing fine, when should i see you again type of appointment. if they ask further questions just let them know that what you are dealing with right now pertains to sensitive information and you feel uncomfortable talking with others besides your physician and that's part of why it's SO important you get in to see her ASAP!!!
and dearheart i understand that something like this is very likely to push you toward the one person in your eyes that does care about you (your T). but you are doing the right thing in NOT going there right now.
(and the "trigger" warning is used when we talk about sensitive issues such as suicide- thoughts, attemts, SI, any type of abuse, or anything else that may 'set off' someone else with painful memories or such. hopefully that helps)Please Please take care and call that DOCTOR!
we are 100% here for you!
((((((((((((((((((((elaine))))))))))))))))))))))))
b2c
poster:B2chica
thread:659807
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/660106.html