Posted by CatieCat on June 22, 2006, at 9:31:07
In reply to Re: i feel sick, posted by Karolina on June 21, 2006, at 23:19:32
Karolina,
I apologize for my earlier posts. I still stand by and firmly believe in my response, and to be honest, I would probably respond the same way if this were to happen exactly the same again. I know one of the reasons I reacted so strongly was because not only did I lose a friend to suicide, but I lost her in the same way - she was threatening her therapist. I'll leave out the details, but hope you can see where I was coming from.
Now with that being said, I'd like to respond to your latest post.
> My T means so much to me and what I meant is that if he told me we had to terminate, I would be devastated. If my T rejected me, then I would feel even more alone. I wouldn't say something like 'i'm going to kill myself and it's going to be because of YOU, it's going to be all YOUR fault'...I would probably just try my best to explain that hearing him bring up the idea about termination really, really upsets me and that I feel like I would have an extremely hard time coping with it, and that it provokes thoughts of harming myself because I am so mad at myself.I hear your fear and your pain, and can also tell you that if I were in your situation I would be feeling the same way. I don't want to sound like a hypocrite, but yes I would *feel the same way. In fact, it did happen to me, and I did feel the same are you are feeling/anticipating.
I can't see your therapist terminating you because of this; they are trained to work with the feelings that come up. As my T would say, if it's too hot he should get out of the kitchen. (Or whatever that saying is <g>).
But I do understand your fear. I do understand what it's like to have one person in the world who cares about you, and the thought of losing them is terrifying.Babble is a great board. Let them/us support you through whatever happens. But please, I'm saying this out of concern, please don't threaten to threaten him if things don't go your way. I understand your feelings; I think many of us do... but talk to us, don't threaten. I don't want to see you go through what my friend did.
Catie
poster:CatieCat
thread:659383
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/660105.html