Posted by alexandra_k2 on December 13, 2005, at 21:27:14
In reply to Re: Criticism and feelings » gardenergirl, posted by allisonross on December 13, 2005, at 14:26:37
> As I have said, feelings are facts...they aren't right...or wrong...they just are.
Feelings are facts in the sense that if you feel angry then it is indeed a fact that you feel angry.
Lets say you are out someplace and feel a sharp stabbing pain in your back. What is likely to happen is that you are going to feel angry and are going to turn around to confront the person who you perceived to have wronged you (thats a fairly typical response to pain).
Now lets suppose this really cute and really sweet looking guy is apologising profusely and it is apparant that he was accidently shoved into you.
Your anger disapates as you appreciate that he did not intend to harm you.
It was a fact that you were angry.
It is also a fact that as you see things from anothers point of view... To appreciate that they didn't mean or intent to harm you...
Well... It then tends to become a fact that the anger you felt... Dissapates.
So... The way we perceive the situation...
The way we 'choose' to describe it...
The way we 'choose' to interpret other peoples intentions (whether they intended to hurt us or not)
Has a significant impact on the feeling that we have.Of course, what feeling we have is a fact.
But we are not forced into retaining it
It can dissipate as we apprecitate people didn't mean to harm us.Make sense?
poster:alexandra_k2
thread:587729
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051210/msgs/588802.html