Posted by Aphrodite on June 17, 2004, at 2:28:57
In reply to Re: Rock vs Hard Place, posted by tabitha on June 17, 2004, at 0:38:57
This is absolutely the place to talk about it! Like you mentioned with your friend, unless someone has "been there," it's hard for them to understand, and we here at Babble have "been there" and "are there."
I understand your frustration about the theraputic relationship. If only we could go in and output our problems, have them process and give helpful data in return, it would be wonderful. But no, it becomes yet another relationship with all the ups and downs of real-life relationships, and once in awhile one thinks, "I'm paying for this??? I can get this anywhere." But, if it works correctly, I think the relationship becomes a safe place to work out all the patterns of what's going on in the real world. I often tire, though, of working on "our relationship" and how often we talk about "us." It seems like a distraction from MY problems, but deep down, I know it's not.
That said, I am wondering if things were better in pre-group days. Can you stop doing group and just have individual sessions with her? If you did that and things did not improve, I think your instincts may be right that it would be time to move on. I know that would be so hard, but I hate picturing you with puffy eyes over all of this.
I'm sorry your friend responded the way he did. Painful though it was, it was probably the only way he knows how to help. I know I often want to jump in and fix everything for those around me when all they really wanted was some validation and caring.
And right now, I wish I could fix everything for you, too. Poet once gave my therapist 2 cyberbonks on the head when he was being difficult, and it worked. Consider your therapist cyberbonked. I hope it tunes her in to your needs.
I hope the break from a session is a good thing that will give you time to recover and regroup.
poster:Aphrodite
thread:357301
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040614/msgs/357463.html