Posted by crushedout on April 10, 2004, at 19:18:10
In reply to Re: Extra session next week stressing me out, posted by pegasus on April 10, 2004, at 1:28:58
Hi pegasus,I guess I was feeling confused about whether she was being manipulative or not. I've had the feeling a lot for the past few months that she's playing a game of smoke and mirrors with me, doing things that aren't blatantly manipulative or f'ed up, but are insidiously so, in a way that I can't really put my finger on. I *think* this is an example of that, but I can't be sure. I've stopped feeling like I can trust her or my own instincts. It's very disconcerting.
Oh, but I didn't interpret the email as putting pressure on me. I just happen to feel pressure. I interpret the email as letting me know that I'm getting the extra session because this issue is going on, and if I weren't she wouldn't give it to me. Which doesn't make sense to me from a therapeutic standpoint. It's not as if she's taking time out of her free time. It was a cancellation. So, why would she not give it to me otherwise if I felt I needed it, or even just wanted it?
> Hi crushed,
>
> This sounds like one of those things where there are a lot of ways to interpret her words. It's interesting that you're interpreting it as putting a lot of pressure on you to perform to her expectations. You know her relatively well at this point, I think. So, maybe that's really what she's intending (that you talk about this particular issue that she's set out for you). Or maybe she meant something entirely different. Not knowing her, I wouldn't necessarily have interpreted her words the way you did. But I can also see how you might feel pressured.
>
> So, are you saying that you don't want the session if you have to submit to her agenda? Or is the session itself beside the point? I was a little confused about which part confused you.
>
> pegasus
>
poster:crushedout
thread:334773
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040409/msgs/335011.html